Pasta Desecration Spurs Outrage

MORRIS, MN — A University of Central Florida alumni has upset religious groups holding Pastafarian services on public campuses, by opening an Italian restaurant serving mainly spaghetti, a nutritious meal so sacred to Pastafarians they call it the Holiness of His Noodly Appendage. According to Adam Susan of the Flying Spaghetti Monsterism Defamation League the actions of the UCF alumni should be seen as a hate crime. “To open a restaurant selling the Holy Body of our Creator to infidels equals kidnapping and extortion,” he replied by e-mail. “It shows a lack of respect for our Holiest of all religions.”

Spurring even more outrage, Paul Zachary Myers, a professor at the University of Minnesota Morris, has released pictures of him, an atheist, trashing a bowl of the Flying Spaghetti Monster’s Noodly Appendages. Myers announced his intention earlier on his blog, sparking a flood of e-mails, including death threats, from both outraged and concerned Pastafarians. Myers does not see the blasphemy in his actions. He claims “it’s just a macaroni damned serving of noodles!”